The Brothers' Wish
by King Hawke
Summary: Zander and Hawke, two brothers, make a wish to go to Naruto's world. Their wish is granted. Written by Hawke and Zander.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: We don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer creatures or Naruto.

_Author's note: Me and my younger brother Zander cowrote this. It was originally his idea, so if you love it, thank my writing skills and his imagination._

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It was a dark and stormy night, and two young men sat in a dark room in an equally dark house. The lightning flashed, revealing the faces of said young men, and, if one were to glance outside, one would spot yet another figure hunched outside the window of the room.

"Beautiful night, huh?" asked the younger of the two, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

The elder of the two smirks, "Oh yeah, heartwarming."

"You know, I was thinking—" the younger said before he was interrupted.

"I know, it hurtsss," the other brother injects, his smirk growing.

"Be careful, snake, you accent's showing," quipped the younger.

He raises an eyebrow, hissing loudly, "You're one to talk, rat. You'd betray our mother for a crumb."

"That much? Anyway, we getting off track, as I was saying, wouldn't it be cool if we could be in the Naruto universe? If we could, what would you have? You know, bloodline, chakra, the works," the younger says slowly.

"But, Zander, the Bleachversse hass plenty of big badsss to blow up with cool powerss. You even get swordsss," hisses the older with a predatory grin.

"Yes, they do, Hawke, but they don't have as cute of girls to hook up with," says the newly identified brother, Zander.

Hawke strokes his chin thoughtfully. He seems to zone out before murmuring, "Yeah, being with Hinata would be awesssome…" His eyes focus and he glares at Zander dangerously. "And if you sssso much asss think about getting her, you're dead meatsss!"

"Don't worry, I won't. Also, in Bleach, don't you have to be like, dead to get a cool sword?" Zander asks, stroking his newly formed mustache.

Hawke frowns darkly, "Good pointsss, I forgot that partsss. Before we continue this merry little discussionsss though, should we invite in our guessst?" His finger flicks open the latch on his back, allowing a short sword to drop into his waiting hand and he yanks it from the sheath.

Zander grins evilly, "He's mine," he growls while pulling out two throwing knives from his sleeves.

"Not if I getsss him firssst!" hisses Hawke excitedly, his other hand reaching for the long bo staff lying against the nearby wall. He grabs the long staff and lunges for the window with his blade pointing forward, only to have the window thrown open. The 'guest' rushes forward, but finds itself pinned to the wall of the house by four throwing knives, a blade through each limb courtesy of Zander. "Sssspoilssport!"

"I try my best," sneers the brother, admiring his handiwork while 'accidentally' tripping one of the many traps that fires a knife at Hawke.

Growling, Hawke twists the handle of the sword, catching the knife between the two blades and throwing it back at him. He raises the sword to his eye and looks between the two blades connected by the handle. "Gotssss you, bratsss!"

Zander catches the knife and slides it up one of his sleeves, "Now, where was I? Oh, yes! I was going to interrogate the intruder, as I'm sure he didn't avoid all of our traps by accident." He stated before sending a sadistic grin the 'guest's' way.

Hawke sheathes his sword onto his back again and mutters, "Why alwaysss interrogate? Why not jussst asssk nicely for a change, Zzzander?" He leans against the bo staff, boredom threatening to overcome him once again.

"Because he might answer, and that would take all the fun out of the torture, I mean questioning," Zander replied, the sadistic grin once again prevailing.

Hawke thinks with a sigh, "_Of course._" He says out loud, "I may sssound like a ssserpent, but you actsss like Orochimaru!"

"Nah, more like Anko or," he pauses as his eyes light up, "maybe even Ibiki!"

The creature shouts out, "Wait! I can grant each of you one wish, anything! Just don't kill me!"

"Pitifulsss," hisses Hawke with a frown. "But why notsss jussst get the wishesss and killsss him anywaysss? Why wasss he ssspying on ussss?"

"It's kind of a long story," the man replies.

"Take your time, take your time, you have about twenty seconds before we start playing Operation on you," Zander mentions casually.

Hawke grins, "Twenty secondsss? More like ten!" He thinks about it briefly. "And, to anssswer your mossst likely thoughtsss, Yesss, we are very sssadistic peoplesss. Hehe."

"Ok! Ok, I was sent by Justin to try and make your lives miserable by granting a wish you didn't really want granted, like say, that Narudo thing you were talking about," the creature rasps.

"I get it. Well, I think we should follow through with that one, don't you agree, Hawke?" retorts Zander playfully.

Hawke nods slowly, "Yesss. Do it, beasssty!"

"Ok, what is your exact wish?" the vengeance demon asks.

"I wish that my brother and I could be put into Naruto's world the day after the Kyuubi attack, me being as old as Naruto, and Hawke being Neji Hyuga's age. We would like the ability to create our own bloodlines after we arrive there," states Zander, examining one of his knives fondly.

Hawke hisses, "Ditto, only I wantsss to be ablesss to ssstop thisss ssstupid hisssingsss!"

"And, we would like to be able to emit a scent that naturally attracts girls to us, and if we so choose, it will be a motherly/sisterly kind of thing," Zander adds as an afterthought.

The older brother snorts and finishes, "Make that lassst part only for Zzzander. Now grantsss usss the wishesss!"

Time slows down as their eyelids slowly close and reopen. Instead of the apartment, a small orphanage meets their now small eyes. Hawke tries to say something but can't, so he growls at his now baby brother and cries loud enough to get someone's attention.

"Oh, what do we have here?" inquires the caretaker after she opened the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: We own us, but not Naruto…yet…hehe

**Three Years Later:**

Naruto cowers behind a three year old boy who is brandishing two identical knives. A five year old stands next to him with an unusually small short sword. A small pile of bullies lay at their feet covered with cuts and bruises.

"There!" announces the three year old proudly. "They never mess with us again!"

The five year old snorts, "Yeah they will. You big baby, get out here!" Naruto scuffles out from behind the other boy. "They're stupid."

Naruto nods alittle in agreement. "Th-thanks, Zander and Hawke," mumbles Naruto.

Zander puts his arm over Naruto's shoulder in a brotherly fashion, "Anytime, Naruto!" Hawke rolls his eyes and brushes some dirt from his short sword.

The caretaker rushes into the courtyard, being lead by several of the other children. "What have you done to these children?" she said in horror.

Zander smiles oh so sweetly, "Who? Me? Would I do dat?" He questions, expertly hiding his knives from sight.

The caretaker eyes him suspiciously before turning to Hawke. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Hawke continues wiping off his sword with his sleeve, not bothering to look up. "Who? Me?" He says as he cleans his sword. "I have no idea what you mean."

"Where did you get that sword?" she demands.

He pulls out a piece of flint and starts sharpening the blade. "What sword?" he says idly, his eyes still never leaving the blade.

"Give me that sword right now!" she says angrily.

He finally glances up at her with a dangerous look in his eye, despite his kind smile. "Where do you want the sword? Kidney, liver, lung, eye, heart, brain, or mouth?" She gawks at him as a murmur washes over the children. "As I said, 'What sword?' " Her mouth opens and closes several times, but no sound comes out.

The ANBU that was supposed to protect Naruto growls out from his perch on a nearby building, "Meddlesome brats, why can't they leave the demon to his fate?"

"Idiot," states the Anbu keeping watch over Zander and Hawke. "You broke the Third's Law!" The first Anbu deflects a poison-tipped sebon needle from the second Anbu with katana and rushes at the three orphans. The other Anbu rushes after him as quickly as he can.

The first Anbu's eyes burn with hatred, and he swings at the three children to decapitate them. His blade is deflected into the ground by two small daggers held by the three year old, who is crouching on the flat edge of the blade and glaring at the Anbu. Ninja wire wraps around the Anbu, the second ninja capturing him. He vanishes from the wire with a shushin, leaving behind his katana. A moment later, he drops from a tree with a gurgled yell. Hawke leans against the top branch, calmly wiping his short sword and new kunai off before sheathing them across his back using ninja wire.

He climbs down the tree, using a pair of kunai as handholds. Finally reaching the bottom, Hawke finds Zander arguing with the remaining Anbu. "I telling you, you gotta teach me how'ta use these things!" he yelled, waving a poisoned sebon needle around, trying to look menacing, but failing miserably.

The Anbu tilts his head, amused at the small child. "Give me the pointy needle back, boy," requests the Anbu.

"Not until you teach me!" declares Zander defiantly. The needle disappears from his hand and reappears in the Anbu's gloved hand. "No fair!"

The Anbu smirks under his mask and says calmly, "Ninja are not about fairness." With that, he slides the needle into his pocket and disappears. Naruto smirks and pulls the sebon out from behind his back.

"We can practice!" Naruto says cheerfully, trying to please his protectors. Zander grins and gives Naruto a noogy.

Naruto whines, but Zander grins evilly, "First lesson, evil Anbu information torture technique: the nooogy!!"

The blonde stops squirming as he absorbs the information. He pales and restarts struggling with increased fervor. "No torture! No torture!" he squeals.

Hawke picks up the big katana and slides it onto his back, making sure it is sideways enough to not drag on the ground. He slowly approaches the young blonde with an identical grin on his face. "Lesson two: Tickle Torture!" he shouts. He pounces on the already captive blonde, tickling his stomach and sides for all he's worth. Naruto starts crying from how much he's laughing.

"Stop!" he yells helplessly. "I'm gonna pee my pants!" They stop and exchange mischievous glances.

"Lesson three," Hawke whispers in Naruto's ear. Naruto pales further and gulps. "Practice, practice, practice," he murmurs. He turns slowly to stare at the other children. Naruto follows his stare and a slow grin crosses his face.

A kid whimpers, "Oh no! Another one!"

All three boys pounce on the kid that was leading the attack on Naruto earlier and apply their lessons until his head is sore and his pants are soaked, much to his embarrassment (which to this day, they never let him live down). The other children scatter in all directions, hiding wherever they can. The caretaker bends over Hawke and reaches for the sword strapped to his back. She freezes in her tracks as the poisoned sebon pokes up from the handle.

Xander glances up at her, "No, no, none of dat, miss'em!" he says with an innocent smile. Hawke turns to her, and she feels very disturbed at the icy glare that is accompanying his friendly smile in her direction.

"Goodbye, miss'em," Hawke states. She quickly brings her hand back and scurries across the courtyard to the office where her messenger pigeons are, only to find them all with their wings clipped, munching peacefully on their fresh food. The cage holding them is wide open. She reaches to close it and they all hop out onto her desk and run around like chickens with their heads chopped off. She huffs and puffs while she runs around her office, trying to collect the pigeons. She accidentally bumps a book, triggering a string which releases a small slingshot, hitting a water balloon that is just above the moving fan.

Zander and Naruto give each other high fives when they hear the panicked cries of the caretaker. "Success!" they say simultaneously.

Hawke raises an eyebrow, "Jinx, you owe me a candy bar." Naruto looks at him in confusion while Zander glares.

"Shut up!" he snaps. His older brother just smiles pleasantly in response.

The Hokage sighs as he stares into his crystal ball. "What do those two have against Konoha?" he murmurs.

His eyes widen in surprise when he hears Hawke mutter under his breath, "Konoha is full of demons. If anyone tries to hurt friend Naruto, they die." Hawke pats the new addition to his armaments protectively. The Hokage stares at the ball in shock when the boy looks up and what looks like directly into the crystal ball.

An Anbu appears in the window. "Lord Hokage!" the Anbu exclaims, "We need to talk about those boys in the orphanage."


End file.
